The Blond Bombshell (Part 2)

5,4,3,2,1 *BOOM*



Part 1 http://sjones84.blogspot.com/2011/02/blond-bombshell-part-1.html

I talked about the issues that many minorities face when trying to approach white women. When I first started gaming It's like my mind went in "reset" mode. The best way to explain it is, that I basically took everything I knew about game and women and put it to the back of my mind and started fresh with game material. All my limited beliefs, my insecurities, my past, my ego. I had to put it back in my mind. It's not an easy thing to do, because at that the time I was at a complete different head-space and also point in life. However for me to grow I needed to be open minded and "try" something new, I was a bit naive, it's not that I didn't get chicks before but I was so enthused about "The Game" that I literally put everything I knew already about women aside, when most of it I already have seen with my own eyes with the naturals I use to roll with.

I would hit the field like a daredevil, and although I was raw (shitloads of confidence, could open but no midgame and closing) I still didn't have polish. Let me explain, genuine, real confidence the "I'm the shit" but not having to say but exude it through your body language is priceless and women notice this consciously and sub-consciously.

Mindset
When my mind went into "reset" mode I would literally approach chicks, and just come of as the entertainer or fun guy. A lot of the earlier stuff I did was just field testing a lot of Snowplow's stuff to be honest I was on the verge of frustration because the first 3 months I was busting my ass with no results of getting some action. I would hit the field with my Caucasian counterparts and I wanted to use the excuse "well its cause I'm black blah blah" but then I read this quote by Senor Fingers(who wrote "Weapons of Mass Seduction" and also was the founder of the now defunct. NextLevelgame.net)

"Race doesn't matter as long as your comfortable with yourself!"

 As soon as I read that I instantly took that "negative belief " out of my mind.  The reason why I'm talking about this first is because your mind influences you.  Having a belief in yourself that you are worthy and enough is powerful, but most importantly not caring about the outcome of an interaction, because either way you win, if you get the girl great, if not you still gain experience on how to improve. That means approaching women of various races and me assuming they were already attracted to me and not worrying about race. Now I know what your thinking, "Wait in part one Solo you said it mattered to certain girls now your saying it doesn't?" No what I'm saying is that I didn't let that hold me back as an excuse for me to stop going after women I wanted. You see if I got dissed for whatever reasons, I literally would walk away and forget about it in minutes. I was so focused back then that few things could fuck with my frame of mind. Positive mindset and supreme confidence really go along way. you gotta understand that, if you approach a girl and she doesn't like the way you look, dress, talk, move, your race etc. That's on her, but if you don't LOVE yourself,  then your already defeated before you even approach her. My frame literally was

"I'm the hottest guy in the bar, nobodies fucking with me"

How do you get to that point? besides believing the part, I also had to "dress" it!

MrGQ 



Before the Makeover



Before the community I knew how to dress well or so I thought, the guys that I hung out with were great dressers, from Capo to some of the natural guys I hit the field with. The reason why I started dressing well wasn't because of women (well that's b.s.) but I genuinely wanted to look and FEEL great when I went out. To me dressing well is part of that. On top of that the town I live in has a super strict dress code, and racially profiled if you dressed a certain way. This  is one of the reasons you don't see a lot of black men in certain bars cause the dress code is to strict and it's one way to keep the "riff raff" out in nicer venues. 

After

The thing is I use to dress in baggy pants, jersey's and shirts etc. However after I started dressing more formal, I would get compliments and what not. The way I felt wearing, a suite or some button up was empowering and it showed in my body language. One time I literally had 3 girls approach me saying how "nice" i looked and "smelt" all within 2 minutes of each other. The ego boost I got was a high let me tell ya I still dress in baggy clothes now and then(mostly when I'm just lounging at the crib) but now a days I dress more "grown". I'm not gonna go on about how looks matter, but how you feel about your physique, and how you dress matter a lot especially if you wanna attract a beautiful women who dresses nice. Now what does this have to do with the blond bombshell? a lot. How you dress is very important, not just with white women but women period. If you dress nice a women will appreciate that, this is universal. How you dress shows how you take care of yourself, dress like a slob with no style and the perception is that your lazy, dress fly and "GQ" and the perception is that your a mack lol.

She probably reads my blog, eeeh

YO YO

I remember reading a thread in some forum were a guy was talking about approaching white women. The guy said that white women were scared when he approached them because he was 6'3, 230 pounds. I knew what the guy's problem was cause I had the same problem(being big and black and all). The thing is a lot of black men stereotypically when they approach any women are very aggressive. This puts women on the spot, and some women (of all races)don't know how to deal with that. For example ever been to a club and see a bunch of "brothers" just stand there, and as soon as fine girl walks by there like "yo yo yo, girl let me holla at you ma".  I see that or I see guys just grab girls by the arm trying to pull then, DON'T DO THAT.  When I first started learning about "body language" I noticed that white women would be tense when I approached, the scared look in their eye(gotta love eye contact). However after a few minutes of me just talking and them realizing I'm not wanting anything from them I could see them relax, smiling and joking a lot shatters a lot of the stereotypical social conditioning that white women have about black men. Truth is turn on the TV, usually you see a rapper acting intimidating or watching an "angry black guy" on reality television this the perception that lot of white girls get about black men due to stereotypes being portrayed in the media and society . Another thing I do is when I approach I don't talk in Ebonics, sure the average white chick might know some slang words, but she is not one of the "homies" so don't overdue it. The whole "Yo YO YO" approach will get you a "YO YO YO" type chick. If you want a respectable women you gonna have to approach and talk to her respectably.

Social Proof
 Social proof can help you in virtually any sort of situation whether it's in your social circle, business and yup you guess it with women. I first learned this concept when I observed a natural doing it before I heard the term period. I had a buddy who would go into the whitest country club in the city. The guy was 6'4, lean, abercombie wearing black dude. The bar was 98% white. However guess what, he had girls literally chasing him from the random girl to the waitresses. Why? he had social proof. He would walk in everyone knew who he was, he was always cracking jokes and was a great guy to be around cause he brought a positive vibe and energy. Girls would be curious cause other girls would always be around him, he would however seldom chase because he was to focus on having fun(and getting bent) on top of that he wasn't worried cause he already had an abundance of women. I asked him how he felt with people hating on him being black at that bar, he said he didn't care because he was so comfortable in himself that he could careless what others thought of him and that girls could usually see that indifference in him but he still bad fun.  I'm not saying you should go to a country club and dress in abercombie. The guy found his niche, and you should too.  Going in venues in an environment were you can thrive will help you, this is why after I left Wisconsin redneck bars and went back to Hip-hop clubs it just seemed a million times easier and the same effort I was putting in got me better results. There was a guy who I was trying to coach who once lamented to me

"These guys(athletes) can get 5 girls(white girls) in their room (college dorm room)with ease and I can't get one. its frustrating"

Well mmh yeah, because of their social status(college athletes are the equivalent to rock stars), they have "groupies" so to speak. However you don't need to be an "athlete" or even be "rich" to have social proof. When I go out I talk to everyone guys and girls, it comes to a point were people say "dude your cool I'll buy you a drink:" or "We should hang out sometime" This isn't unusual. I've met people who after talking to me, invited me to hang with them and their friends and I got in venues and other things for free. One of the biggest traits of a natural is that he is social, most guys who are social savvy are witty, charismatic, cool and people love being around them because it's always a fun time. As I stated earlier though, you can have social proof in almost every aspect of your life. Whether it's business(co-workers, boss's, clients etc) or even your hobbies. Become a man of social awareness and intelligence, learn about body language, eye contact, immerse yourself in currents events, and so forth so that you always have something interesting to talk about.

These are some of the things that have helped me, most of these may seem basic. However the basic things work well espeically if you advance in them. As a black guy I know how frustrating it can be because a lot of the community caters towards mostly whites and Asians. The few black guru's that are out there seldom or rarely talk about this. Then you have forums who have censorship and this topic is "swept" under the rug so to speak. The thing to remember is when you approach any women not just white is to always have confidence,  genuine confidence can break through a lot of barriers, and race is one of them


Peace